cherylnyasha

stop telling girls
that they’re not skinny enough

stop telling girls
that their feet are too large

stop telling girls
that their stomachs need to be flat

stop telling girls
that they should always cross their legs

stop telling girls
that they have too much muscle

stop telling girls
that a d cup is too large

stop telling girls
that their thighs are too fat

stop telling girls
to suck in their guts

stop telling girls
not to sit like a man

stop telling girls
that their fucking curls are too big

stop telling girls
that they can’t take up space
like a fucking man can
because
yes
they
fucking
can

S.S.  (via tobeheal-ed)
cherylnyasha
Sometimes in black communities we forget that black girls are girls, not little women. My friend then shared with me her own story of being sexually abused and ending up pregnant and in need of an abortion at age 12 because her family members irresponsibly left her with a male family friend. The first time a 12-year-old black girl ever told me she had been raped, I, too, was 12 and she was a friend. The second time, I was a 22-year-old teacher, and the 12-year-old was my student.

I realize now, having heard a version of this story, yet again, that as gut-wrenching as these stories are, among black girls they are not uncommon; they are not even remarkable. So many of the highly educated black women you see went to hell and back before reaching the age of 18. Education has become our drug of choice.

[…]For black girls, educational achievement is not always the best indicator of a stable, happy home life. For me, education offered a goal and reward structure that was predictable and that I could control, simply by doing what was asked of me. In the midst of so many things I could not control, school was attractive. I imagine that for many black girls the narrative is similar.
cherylnyasha

10 Old Fashioned Dating Habits We Should Make Cool Again

  • 1. Coming to the door to pick someone up.
  • 2. Trying to dress really nicely for a date.
  • 3. Bringing flowers or other tokens of affection to the first date.
  • 4. Going dancing that’s not grinding on a grimy club floor.
  • 5. Straightforwardly asking someone out and not calling it “hanging out.”
  • 6. Additionally, being clear about when you’re “going steady.”
  • 7. Romantic gestures like writing poems.
  • 8. Turning electronics off and just being with one another.
  • 9. The general concept of asking permission for things.
  • 10. Not assuming sex is to be had at any point in time.
  • by Kate Bailey